


i want a moment to be real

by starberrylemonade



Category: RWBY
Genre: 5 times + 1 time, Anti-Faunus Racism (RWBY), Fantastic Racism, Gen, Spoilers: Volume 8 (RWBY), Volume 7 (RWBY), Volume 8 (RWBY), amity arena cards being in universe canon, and i mean like the BAREST hints, happy huntress marrow, i am trying to manifest ok. please hold on i am manifesting please hold on a second i, i listened to rät by penelope scott on repeat to write this, marrow defects, marrow punches someone (but they deserve it), rated t for a couple swears, spoilers for v8 ep6 midnight, tiny hints of bumbleby flora fun and fair game
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-18 15:07:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28745214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starberrylemonade/pseuds/starberrylemonade
Summary: His mouth is moving before he can stop himself.“This society is set up for faunus to be at the bottom, and humans are willing participants. They benefit from doing nothing to help us, but there are still those who actively abuse us.”The girls stare at him. He cringes internally. The last time he brought up faunus politics around his team Harriet told him to ‘lighten up’ and Elm laughed in agreement, clapping him on the back hard enough to send him tumbling forward. The silent message was to not bring it up again.“Anyway!” he adds hastily with a fake smile he hopes is convincing. “I didn’t come here to solve systemic societal issues.” his tone is definitely not.---or: five times marrow felt he didn't belong and one time he knew he did.
Relationships: Marrow Amin & Blake Belladonna, Marrow Amin & Fiona Thyme, Marrow Amin & Harriet Bree & Clover Ebi & Elm Ederne & Vine Zeki
Comments: 25
Kudos: 45





	i want a moment to be real

**Author's Note:**

> title from I'm Still Here from treasure planet  
> i chose not to use warnings but this fic deals heavily with anti-faunus/fantasy racism so please take care! please let me know if i should tag or warn for anything else.  
> anyway marrow PLEASE get out of there sir

**1.**

He’s sitting in class for his second year at Atlas when the news breaks. The notification pops up on his scroll, and then he hears it pop up on the scrolls of the students beside him, a chorus of ‘ _ping_ ’s echoing through the classroom. 

There was a cave-in at the mines caused by an explosion. Thirteen dead. All faunus. 

Marrow can’t breathe. He forces himself to keep his head down as he knows every pair of eyes slowly turns to look at him, the only faunus in his class, his grade, maybe even the school. He swallows around the scream that threatens to make its way up his throat and shoves his scroll back into his pocket. The professor continues teaching, moving forward as if nothing happened. The dull noise of his teachings go in one ear and out the other. Once the bell rings Marrow runs out of the room as fast as he can, knowing the entire way everybody is watching him, waiting for his reaction. He refuses to give it to them. 

He makes it back to the dorm room, thankfully empty, and collapses on his bed. The tears finally come, as do the mournful screams, but he knows better than to let anyone hear them. Face shoved in his pillow, he lays there for hours crying on and off and drifting in and out of consciousness. He thinks maybe his teammates come back to the room a few times, but they don’t bother him. Whether out of kindness or ignorance, he can’t tell. He doesn’t care anymore. 

Eventually, he wakes again in darkness, the soft sounds of his teammates breathing gently filling the room. The moon is passing the window of their dorm room, just barely visible through all the lights of Atlas. Marrow checks his scroll. There’s a few messages from his parents, asking if he heard about the mines and if he’s doing okay. He can’t bring himself to reply. 

Another notification makes him pause before he can roll back over in misery. According to some Atlas newsfeed, an Atlas Prep student had attacked students after they had made comments about the explosion. Apparently, she was secretly a faunus the whole time, something nobody knew, and she was expelled.

He rolls over onto his back and stares up into the blackness, taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly. Tomorrow, he’ll put back on the mask he always has and pretend like it never happened. He’ll ignore any of the comments. He’ll be a good little soldier. He can’t afford to get expelled. He texts his parents before falling asleep again. 

_Me: I’ll be okay. Thanks._

_Me: Check out_ _this article_ _, by the way._

In the morning he has two replies. 

_Dad: Good for her._

_Mom: Good for her!!!_

He reads them on his way to class and smiles.

**2.**

His new uniform is stark white and pressed neatly. He stares at himself in the mirror for a bit longer than necessary, smoothing the jacket for the fifth or sixth time. It’s his first day as a real Atlas Huntsman, and he’s terrified. Being part of the Atlas military is high prestige around Remnant, and he wants to make a good first impression. Taking a deep breath, he exits his room, and strides proudly down the hall. By the time he gets to the briefing room, he’s gotten so many stares he wonders if he put his uniform on inside out or something. He takes his place next to a fellow cadet and waits eagerly in parade rest for their commanding officer to assign them their first mission of the day. 

His skin prickles with excitement and he has to bite his lip to keep from smiling. This is it. This is the start of his career. The thing he’s been working towards for years. He can faintly hear the gentle swish of his tail behind him, but he’s too excited to worry about it. 

The cadet next to him shoots him a look, though it’s unreadable. Marrow turns his eyes forward to the board, reading all of the possible missions he could be assigned to. He gets to ‘pre-primary escort’ when he feels it. Whoever is next to him has reached back and grabbed his tail in an attempt to stop it from wagging, grip hard and painful. 

The next few minutes are a blur. 

Marrow thinks he makes a noise, a shout, of some kind. Thinks he feels his fist connect with the cadet’s face. Thinks he hears his commanding officer run into the room. Thinks he feels the restrain of the gravity bolas as he yells at the offending tail-grabber. Through all the chaos he hears whispers from his fellow soldiers. 

“I knew that _they_ would be too dangerous to work here!” “What was the general thinking letting a savage _mutt_ in?!” “What an _animal_!”

He’s escorted to the general’s office and keeps his head down the entire time the officer’s grating voice relays the events of what happened. Not once does he mention the inciting action from the cadet. General Ironwood nods, strangely calm, before turning to acknowledge Marrow. Although he’s restrained, he straightens up immediately, but he doesn’t bring his eyes up. 

“Cadet...Amin, was it?” the General starts. “I’d like to hear your side of the story.”

Marrow blinks. This has never happened before. Every other time something like this happened, whether it was an inappropriate comment or a physical aggression, he never got to defend himself. Marrow finally looks into the General’s eyes, and sees that there’s a little bit of light there. Maybe...maybe he has a chance this time. 

“Um...the cadet next to me grabbed my tail without my consent, sir,” he says, barely keeping his voice from shaking as the officer grabbing his arm tightens his grip. The General nods as he walks back to his desk.

“I see…” he says, and reaches into a drawer to pull out a few papers. His eyes scan down over them for a couple seconds before resting on the officer again. 

“Non-consensual touching of a faunus’s traits is considered a hate crime, as I’m sure you know, officer.” He grabs the papers and once again stands tall and intimidating over the man, holding them out for him to take. “I suggest you punish the cadet who did it accordingly.”

The tone of his voice means that it’s not actually a suggestion. It’s an order. Marrow’s shoulders slump in relief. The officer is dismissed and Marrow is released from the restraints. The man leaves bitterly, grumbling the entire way out of the office. General Ironwood beckons Marrow forward.

“Unfortunately, assaulting a fellow soldier is punishable as well.” Marrow knows this. His hand still hurts, and it shakes behind his back. “So I am going to have to suspend you for a week.” 

Could be worse, Marrow thinks. He nods, solemnly, still processing the entire situation. The General sighs. 

“I wish I could do more for you. I know we, Atlas, have never been great with all of...this. However, please know I am trying. You are dismissed.” 

Marrow bows his head and goes to leave, tail hanging limply behind him. Before he closes the door, he turns to look at the General. 

“Thank you, sir,” he says, and Ironwood smiles. 

A week later, he finds out the cadet only had three days of suspension and is currently out on a mission in the Solitas tundra. Marrow gets stuck with pre-primary escort missions for the next month. 

Not that he doesn’t trust the General to properly punish the right people, but he feels a little cheated anyway. He wonders if he should have expected this.

**3.**

“I’ve called you all here today for a recon mission,” The General states, shutting the blinds to his office and pulling up some graphics. It’s been a while since all of them have done recon, and Marrow’s excited for the change of pace. Harriet eyes him as his tail starts swishing, and he reaches back to grab it. He knows better now. 

“More than a decade ago an investigation into four murders was dropped due to unknown circumstances and lack of any solid suspect. Ownership of the establishment was handed over to someone distant in the owner’s family since she and her daughters were both killed that night. However, recent complaints have been surfacing from staff about an abusive workplace and that is attracting Grimm. I worry that perhaps there is something darker going on.” The General clicks a button and pulls up a picture of a hotel. Marrow recognizes it instantly and his tail drops. 

“The _Glass Unicorn_ may not be as popular as it once was, given the murders that took place just within its walls, but regardless it should be investigated just in case there truly is something awful happening. I am sending you five in to do recon. No one will bat an eye at Atlas elite military taking up residency in this hotel. You will get in, search and report, and get out. Any questions?”

 _Questions are for the weak._

Marrow steps forward. 

“I...I can’t go on this mission.”

The entire team looks at him like he’s grown a second head, and even Ironwood looks surprised. As the rookie, Marrow had been so keen on taking any missions he could to prove himself. The General recovers first.

“And...why is that?”

Marrow steels himself with a breath, and makes direct eye contact. 

“This establishment doesn’t serve faunus, sir. It never has.” 

The silence afterwards feels suffocating. Or maybe that’s Marrow’s heart rate spiking so high he thinks he might pass out. Ironwood sighs, he’s been doing that a lot recently, and closes the image of the hotel. 

“I...I don’t know how I missed that. I apologize.” He looks at Clover, the two of them silently communicating what the next logical step is. Eventually, the leader turns to look at him.

“Are you okay with staying behind this time? I don’t think we need all five of us for this. Plus, that means you could help us with navigation and security.” 

Marrow nods. It’s better than doing nothing. Ironwood dismisses them and as Marrow walks out the door, he turns back, remembering the first time he stood in this office alone as a cadet. The feeling in his gut is different from then. 

He does not thank the General this time. 

And he does not thank him when he is left behind from Mantle patrol when the new teams of kids arrive in Atlas a few weeks later.

**4.**

“They’re here! They’re here!”

Elm’s booming voice echoes through the Ace Ops common room. She bursts through the door carrying a box on her hip, Vine following closely behind with another one in his arms. She slams it down on the table, Harriet just barely moving her plate of food out of the way to avoid collateral damage. Vine, predictably, sets his down much calmer next to it. Clover peeks his head out of his room. 

“What’s going on out here? What’s all the ruckus?”

Elm races across the floor and drags him out by the arm. 

“They’re here!” Clover laughs good naturedly, used to being moved around by her. 

“What’s here, Elm?”

Elm rubs her hands together and tears the box open with a triumphant shout. Harriet comes to her side and peeks into the box, eyes lighting up. Marrow rises off the couch as everybody grabs a small pack of...something. 

“Our Amity Arena cards are finally here! Look at us! I don’t think we’ve ever looked so good,” Elm declares, holding up her card to the light and watching the holographic film shine. Marrow reaches into the box to grab his card. He looks good, the artist that worked on them captured him well. Amity Arena cards are a fairly new concept, having just been approved by the Atlas council, but they’re already a hit with the public. Plus, a little bit of good PR never hurt anybody. He can’t imagine what faunus kids in Mantle will think seeing him on these cards. The thought warms him inside. 

“I think it matters more what they say about us,” Harriet grumbles, looking at the back of her card. “They called me impatient.” 

Clover pats her back with a snort. “They aren’t wrong, are they? Besides, they _did_ compliment you first!” Harriet flicks her nose with a huff, conceding as she smiles at it.

“They mention Elm more than me in my own card,” Vine huffs out a laugh at the end. Elm throws an arm around him and knocks her head gently into his. Clover holds his up with a wink. 

“They talk about Qrow in mine, so I get that.” He doesn’t look upset about it though. Neither of them do. Marrow flips his card around, excited now for what the Atlas council has to say about him.

“ _Marrow Amin is one of our Elite Ace Ops. He is a faunus, but unlike much of the riff raff, he is loyal to our general and Kingdom_.” 

“...riff raff?” he whispers, heart dropping. He keeps reading. The next part of the description basically calls him a liability for his tail. Of course. Of course the council would write something like this. He should never have gotten his hopes up. 

“What does yours say, Marrow?” Clover prompts with an encouraging smile. 

Marrow blinks. He looks down at the card, and his own painted face stares back at him. 

“Oh, you know…” he says, gesturing vaguely with his free hand. Clover raises a brow but doesn’t comment as Elm pulls him in to brag about how they called her skill second only to their leader. 

He sets the card down on the table and retreats to his own room, feeling sick. Nobody notices. 

**5.**

He hates it here. 

Babysitting the new kids was bad enough already. Now he’s stuck with Harriet’s teasing comments and the cold of the mines and the blatant reminder of what happens in them. And the entrance is blocked off. Ugh. Great. Another thing to add to the list of why he hates it here. Harriet calls over the comms about it and he hears one of the girls gasp. He and Harriet search around for a way around the rubble. 

“I wish I could take back all of the pain my family has caused the faunus...and all of my complacency in it.”

Marrow looks behind him to see Blake resting a hand on Weiss’s shoulder. She looks...genuinely regretful, and it's the first time he’s ever seen that expression on a Schnee. The way she looks at Blake, the way the rest of her team look at her, he’s never felt that before. His mouth is moving before he can stop himself.

“This society is set up for faunus to be at the bottom, and humans are willing participants. They benefit from doing nothing to help us, but there are still those who actively abuse us.”

The girls stare at him. He cringes internally. The last time he brought up faunus politics around his team Harriet told him to ‘lighten up’ and Elm laughed in agreement, clapping him on the back hard enough to send him tumbling forward. The silent message was to not bring it up again. 

“Anyway!” he adds hastily with a fake smile he hopes is convincing. “I didn’t come here to solve systemic societal issues.” his tone is definitely not. He gestures to the wall behind him.

“Harriet found a gap in the rubble, one we think one of you could fit through.” he looks at Blake, expression growing fond against his will. “Ideally someone with a knack for seeing in the dark?”

Blake looks at him with an expression he can’t quite place, and her delayed reaction suggests she might have had something to say about it. But they keep moving forward. She gets in the wall, Marrow curses the genetic lottery for missing big time on the night vision gene, the wall comes down, they chase after the geist. Marrow (admittedly) shows off a little in front of the kids, they do their combo attacks, they win. All in all a normal mission for the Ace Ops. 

As they walk out of the rubble of the mines, his team is assaulted by excited overeager teenagers with way too many questions. Clover proudly announces how they’re personally handpicked for their talents, Marrow takes the opportunity to brag a little bit, Elm shoots him down, the team laughs at him. All in all a normal day for the Ace Ops. 

When Harriet explains the dynamic of their group, he sneaks a glance at team RWBY. Blake’s ears are flattened on her head and the rest of the team look similarly discouraged. Blake stares at him with that same unreadable expression. Yang lays a hand on her shoulder and the look they share is so tender Marrow has to turn away. Teams...shouldn’t be that close. It’s a liability. He was never close with his academy team or the team he was on before joining the Ace Ops. The kids are making a mistake. 

He looks back again. 

**+1**

What the fuck.

What the _fuck_.

Okay, he never thought he’d be where he is now. Defected from the military, on the run, camping out in the Happy Huntresses hideout with his face plastered on the wanted screens across Atlas and Mantle. 

It’s been a wild couple hours for him, give or take. 

Fiona hands him a cup of coffee. It tastes _so_ much better than the crap they have in the briefing room. He gives her a tired smile and a thumbs up and he gets one in return. When he’d shown up on their doorstep, none of the women had wanted him. Understandably, they didn’t trust him, but all that went away when Fiona gently pushed her way to the front with sympathy in her eyes and an outstretched hand. Robyn relented immediately. Marrow tossed his Atlas issue military jacket in the furnace. The women let out a chorus of cheers. 

“Welcome to the Happy Huntresses, wags,” Robyn greets him with a lopsided smile. His tail starts wagging behind him and for once he doesn’t feel the need to stop it. Joanna comes up behind him and drapes a new jacket over his shoulders. There’s a hole in the back for his tail, and the bird pin on it shines in the low light. 

In between running from the government, stealing from the government (which took a little more than a push from May), and running around Mantle killing grimm, he hasn’t really had time to think all that hard about his decision. When Robyn asks him what made him leave he couldn’t find the words. Not that he didn’t know why, he’d just never been allowed to say so before. 

That night he curls up in a blanket next to Fiona on the couch and speaks. He speaks until his throat is raw from anger and sadness and disappointment about how the military, how Atlas, how even his teammates treated him and other faunus. He feels...a lot. Mostly disgusted that he didn’t leave earlier, that he didn’t do more to stop it. 

“I really thought I would have made a difference, especially with how high up I was in the ranking,” he mumbles, staring at his reflection in a mug of cocoa. He glares at it. “But I was wrong.”

“You _are_ making a difference, Marrow. You’re just doing it down here instead of up there. And...I’ll be honest, you did a lot up there too.” 

Marrow gives her a tired look. Fiona pulls something out of her hand with her semblance and flashes it at him. His eyes go wide. 

“That’s--”  
“Your Amity Arena card, yeah.” she flips it over in her hand a couple times. “I actually saw a lot of faunus kids down here carrying it with them. It was the only card a lot of them had. You were, no, _are_ an inspiration, Marrow. And I believe you’ll do a lot of good down here too.”

Marrow feels tears prick at the corner of his eyes. Fiona laughs and smushes his face in her hands. It feels really good to have a team that actually cares about him and isn’t afraid to admit it. 

The next day they meet up with the kids. Most of them aren’t exactly happy to see him. Blake zeroes in on the Happy Huntress pin on his new jacket and smiles. 

“I’m happy for you,” she says to him, as they’re finishing a wave of grimm on the outer perimeter. “I was...trapped in a place where I felt I had to hide who I was for a long time. And even before that I was trapped.” 

Marrow thinks about the picture they had of team RWBY in the Atlas files. Blake had a black bow on the top of her head, and a shy smile. He realizes, now, what all those looks from her were about. She understood. 

A grimm rounds the corner and he and Blake nod at each other as he grabs the end of Gambol Shroud and uses it as leverage to throw her head first at it. She stabs it with a shout and uses her semblance to dodge when Marrow unhooks Fetch and starts shooting. Yang comes around the corner and finishes it with a well placed explosive on it’s back. A warm feeling unfurls in his chest as the girls reach out to give him high fives. As they inform Fiona that they finished the sector, Marrow turns around to where he knows one of the cameras are and shoots it without hesitation. 

“Fuck Atlas,” he says under his breath. 

“FUCK YEAH!” Yang shouts in response. Marrow smiles sheepishly at her and jumps on a hoverbike. They make their way to the crater where more and more people are arriving by the minute. He’s about to go meet up with the Happy Huntresses when he feels a tug on the bottom of his coat. He looks down and sees a small kid, a fox faunus, with ginger hair and green eyes. Their ears twitch on top of their head and the smile they give him is wide. 

“Thank you!” the kid yells up at him happily. Marrow looks up to see the kid’s mother standing there with a fond expression, her tail swishing behind her slowly. He kneels down to the kid and offers up a hand for a high five, which the kid eagerly reciprocates. 

“I wanna be just like you when I grow up!” they yell. Marrow’s heart soars. He feels tears well up in his eyes and he ruffles the kid’s hair with a wet laugh. He stands and turns to see the Happy Huntresses and the kids waiting for him with friendly smiles. Without hesitation, he runs to them, and feels warmth overtake his whole body even through the Solitas cold. 

_I belong here_ , he thinks, as tears spill freely down his cheeks. _I belong here._

**Author's Note:**

> i really really wanted to write a fic that delved deeper into marrow and what he's no doubt experienced as a minority in atlas. im a person of color myself, but im open to constructive criticism on the portrayal of the events of course. 
> 
> find me on tumblr: starryeydsailor  
> find me on discord: starry#1320


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